The Pain Barrier

Some humans when they are exposed to emotional turmoil suffer from bouts of deep-seated unhappiness & depression. These emotional problems cause the human race as much if not more pain angst & sorrow than any physical attacks that occur to us. Why this is the case I’m not certain I do have some loose theories, however it doesn’t really matter why it is our response to emotional pain that is the important factor. When you feel rejected or angry & you have been hurt who causes the pain, when someone belittles you verbally over a long period , or another person try’s to control your actions through there over bearing persona, is it the other person who causes the negative emotional responses. Fear, anger, anxiety, unhappiness. There is no doubt that the aggressors negative energies are a significant factor, but by no means the whole story where does the inner pain & angst’s most people suffer from at some point in there life come from? The pain comes from within it is just there waiting for some nasty insecure person to bring into our consciousness.

The power to receive emotional pain comes from within us! Not from the aggressive controlling type who like to inflict there insecurities on other’s. Bully’s & controlling people have major fears & inferiority complex’s it is there weakness that controls there actions, it is our response to there actions that causes the pain. Who is at fault doesn’t really matter we can’t control other peoples thoughts & actions with any precision, but we can adapt & refine the way we respond to our emotional encounter’s with other humans. If we criticize or hate bully after years of deferring to there wishes what does this negative emotion do? It causes pain to ourselves, it takes us closer to there mentality to hate them is to become them. Certain types of demeanor attract these weak aggressor types it is strange how the attraction is often mutual put these personality types together you get torment & anguish on both sides. So what’s the answer to this paradox? The answer is to simply love your self to fully accept the person you are, the answer is not to seek solace & sympathy from others, the answer is to fully accept theses types for what they are weak minded. When you fully respect yourself your demeanor will naturally change your emotional response to others.

Controlling weak people will alter the way they interact with you, as will all people as you gain self respect, remember the pain comes from you not them they have no real power to inflict emotional pain . It is not easy to find true love & respect for yourself
I am beginning to find it myself through various different sources it must come from within to succeed; it is truly a marvelous feeling when gained some lucky persons are born with it. A negative response to this statement would be your right up your own arse mate! Does that make you happier to think like that, I very much doubt it, in fact I am certain negative comments to others create negative emotions within ourselves.

When you love & respect yourself your in a position to give love & happiness to others if you don’t love yourself you cannot love another person unconditionally, you cannot give what you haven’t got to give you cannot receive what you are unable to feel about yourself . To me self respect is the most important thing to strive for in life you cannot give love & respect in a truly altruistic manner if it is not there to give, by respecting yourself you are able to affect others by giving love & respect to them. It is a widely accepted fact humans are happiest when we help & give yourself freely to others. To love yourself is to heal yourself not an easy task I admit, but well worth it if you can achieve it. Take it from me!


Peter O’Brien 9.5.09